Oh wait no, no I’m wrong. They don’t want to be friends at all. They’re coming at us with spears and dear me, is that really a battering ram? Oh look they’ve reached the wall. They’re coming over it!

There is this extremely loud fat bastard Westerner priest who is screaming at us after have just wiggled through a hole in the wall. I would be screaming too, that could not have been a comfortable fit. Also his makeup is running. It’s kind of terrifying.

Our soldiers are running away like girls. The Western cooties are indeed known to be quick and lethal. Best to get away, yes.

They…they’ve got fire. Why are they burning before they pillage? It’s really a terrible thing. You’d think the barbarians would know that it’s very very hard to pillage after burning or while you burn. Extra risk of crispy fried barbarian that way.

So it’s kind of the apocalypse, at least that’s what we thought at the time…since the Franks were burning and slashing and hacking things to bits and putting babies on spikes… you know they taste just like chicken, they do… The Franks were high connoisseurs of babies and helpless women…you see that all through history really.

And then…there was the mess with the Emperors switching out….See there was Andronikos and then HE got replaced by Isaac who got blinded, blinded I say by his brother Alexios – very loving familial relationship I say there, very loving. And then of course Isaac’s son, Alexios IV, those are roman numerals there, not that the second Alexios was a crack addict or hemophiliac…though one really doesn’t know, does one? All this intermarrying and sleeping with nieces, nephews, dead brothers, and goats… really it’s a wonder any of them had any actual braincells.

But anyways we hated Alexios IV because he was a traitor and he not only traveled with the Bastard Foreigner Franks but he invited them to stay and they caused all sorts of problems. And because they did that, Alexios V who really had no relation whatsoever save that he was sleeping with Alexios III’s youngest daughter and he strangled Alexios IV which led the Frankish clergy to incite their soldiers against him and there were many battles, but finally the bastard Franks had conquered the city and then were sacking right, left, sideways, and upside down, and then they put Baldwin of Flanders as Emperor who was subject to Rome and thus the Great Schism was temporarily patched at least according to the Holy Roman Church and that’s how the whole thing ended.

At least until the Fifth Crusade…but that’s a story for another time. Either way you cut it, the Constantinopolitans and jeeze…say that five times fast I dare you. The good old commons lost out and none of them were at all happy until 1453 when the Ottomans came with their empire of furniture and they became Istanbulians instead. Much easier to say.

It took place at the hour of ten in the morning, not nine, not eleven, but ten precisely.  This Chronicler, also known as the Member at Large was the first to arrive, as she has a nasty habit of always attempting to be early.  The greatly esteemed President arrived at exactly ten and two minutes past the hour and the Treasurer arrived at ten and five minutes past the hour.

Pleasantries were exchanged. The how-do-dos and the fare’st-thou-wells.  This took approximately seven of the minutes used for the meeting of the officers of the History Student Council.   It should be noted that the President-Vice and the Secretary were not in attendance, as they had pressing engagements elsewhere. Where they were was not given to this Chronicler to know, but we are assured that the engagements were of the most important matter and the President-Vice and Secretary of our esteemed Club had paid their respects and given their regrets to Madam President.

But I digress.   After the pleasantries were exchanged, we then turned to the matters at hand for which we had gathered together to discuss.   First on the agenda for the meeting was the concept of merchandise that would be sold in order to add funds to the Club’s coffers so that we may continue to bring such luxuries as the free pizzas to our gatherings.

Pens with the HSC informations were brought up as an option as well as sport bracelets from the company of the trading oriental which provides such things cheaply and in great quantity with our selected customizations.

We also further discussed the idea of t-shirts and came to a satisfactory consensus. Order forms shalt be designed and approved by Madam President and then shalt be dispersed amongst the members of the Club and the faculty of our beloved Department.

Several outings were also discussed. The perennial voyages to the Renaissance Faire and several other trips were discussed.   Other venues for providing more funds to the coffers were a bake sale and hot cocoa sale once it gets much more nippy outside.   There was also a movie night suggested that we will endeavor to host with members of the faculty for all-around fun and merriment.

And thus the meeting did end and we did depart with much elation and joy.